ARTICLE: The Hypocrites I Know

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I have always maintained that the problems of Nigeria go way beyond
the Presidency, but Buharists no let us hear word. So, today, i shall
throw caution to the wind and share with you a typical class scenario
by these same people that want change. I will be hunted for this, but
I just cannot care less as I hope you will see classic similarities
between this commonplace scenario and Nigeria.

At the end of every lecture is the signology section, usually. It
operates on the FIFO (first in, first out) principle, when the
hypocrites are contained. But of course, this is Nigeria: Rather than
submit on the pile they submit beneath it! So that when the pile is
flipped for signing, FIFO becomes LIFO (last in, first out). Yes, even
among the supposed intelligentsia of my generation.

One would think it shouldn’t take much commonsense to understand that
if you are in a hurry, then you must submit your booklet early; not
lobby, or smile at the lecturer to get signed before us unsmiling
folks. But then, it does take much commonsense, apparently. And as SLS
observed, it doesn’t take much sense to cheat. Or to do whatever you
don’t want Ayk to say you do!

But it gets worse. When you stand so much for order and equity, you
get targeted: your booklet moves from first to middle, if it does not
vanish outrightly! Not only are latecomers signed ahead of you, even
people that submitted just after you get signed way before you. Yes,
that is how integrity is appraised even in a class of a hundred and
fifty.

It is bad enough that the person overseeing the submission doesn’t
care, it is bad that the signatory cannot be bothered, even by ghosts,
it is worse that the poor fellow agitating for what is right is
targeted. And when he writes about them, he is the villain. Again, it
takes much introspection, sense, to note that shameless people clamour
to change a country when they have not even changed themselves.

I will not be a part of a society that collapses on itself because the
truth is forbidden; I’d rather leave. Charity does begin at home. I
can imagine the vituperations i will get on this piece tomorrow, and
for a long time to come, yet I am comforted in the knowledge that
whoever stands in the way of truth ought not be acknowledged, or
reckoned with. They keep beaming yèyénátù smiles at lecturers, small
time now they will say they are harassed, àbí na molested. So much for
MDG3: gender equality!

And when the head is rotten, there’s so little a finger can do. Una
say “keep quiet”, everyone does except the friends of power, then you
go right ahead and listen to them. Una say “sit down”, everyone sits
except the friends of power, and they get signed anyway, right there
and then. Una say “nobody joins my class from now on”, nobody does,
until…

Na so Naija go take beta, àbí? SMH…

GMB, Change!

Ení bá máa dá’so fún’ni, t’orùn è làá ‘kóó wò! Whoever wants to sew
clothes for one must have his attire appraised first. They want me to
vote for Change, yet all I see them do is rot…

Ayk Fowosire (c/o Ayk_EDIT),
Sagamu.
@adelayok

The sole problem with Nigeria is the phenomenon my people call,
Aríje-nì’di-‘bàjé: those that profit from chaos. You think Jona has
done woefully, yet some people have contributed immensely to the
perpetuation of his woes. I am told someone gave 5 Billion naira.
Luckily, such people are Nigerians, not aliens. Even the hypocrites I
know are known to every one of us in class!

Will Buhari be able to prosecute Atiku, Babangida, Tinubu, Saraki,
Obj, Amaechi, et al, when he is President? Will someone like SLS not
be targeted when he blows the whistle on Buhari? Will Buhari damn the
bad-belle as I shall now do?:

Anyone that targets Ayk for his stand on truth and integrity and
orderliness, àbegì, live and let live o; otherwise:

Iwájú n’ìgbín nwo ire è; the snail watches his blessings from afar (he
is never able to catch up),
simply because,
Owó t’ògèdè bá gbé, ara è ló fií nà; whatever hand, branch, the banana
(or plantain) raises, it beats itself with.

Àmín!

Contunu to target his booklet, ehn, just contunu…

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